Well I'll start my blog on my utter hatred for the the greatest social mobiliser, yet the greatest bane on mankind, the Automobile.

There is perhaps no lesser example of human intolerance and arrogance than the various forms of the internal combustion engine powering our atrophied, fat, lazy bodies through the dead corpses of millions of years old sea life.

So what is it I hate so much? I, like the next red-blooded man, wouldn't think twice about getting behind the wheel of some sports car, hot chick in the passenger side blasting our way to freedom at 200mph listening to Dire Straits. (well okay perhaps not Dire Straits). Alas I have neither the money or the time to do such, instead the car becomes a mere torment for me in as many ways as possible.

First on the list is the distinction made by our classless society that car ownership is a right. Some little fucking scrote chav scum will be driving his 1l Corsa (or more likely the one he just half inched) with no insurance, MOT, Tax, anything. Asked why he does it the usual response will be something of the ilk, "It is too expensive to run a car". Well then don't fucking run one.

Of course it is the cunts in Whitehall which make this specific distinction, the cost of car ownership is low enough to not concern some rich harlot in London owning a 7l 4x4 just to drive to the shops, yet is high enough that the scum classes can't afford to do it properly so just do it illegally. In the end the people in the middle (like alot of us) pay for the majority of the tax burden on the car.

Of course the government blood sucking doesn't stop there, we are going to pay VAT on repairs etc. And then the mechanics will be paying income tax on top of that which has to be factored into how much we get charged. So again it become a sink for cash. And of course don't forget insurance tax, yay :)

All of this wouldn't be so bad if I felt the tax burden of owning a car went back into the road network, or even other public transport. If it does I don't see it, the motorway network will be taken over by private funding through stealth, petrol tax will keep increasing, roads will still be shitty. In the end this money goes back into places like schools to which the scrote chavs will drive their bastards children to, illegally no doubt, once again fucking the system.

Trust me if my work place wasn't in a stupid place to get to I would take public transport, but there is a woeful lack of any sensible method which ironically is more cost effective than the car.

Now on to my other reason for hating the car. I live next to a main road (well in fact two). It is my own fault after all, I bought the place, but still the noise pollution drives me insane.

The worst offenders are once again the chav scum classes, they "pimp" their rides (we come back to 1l corsas) with fucking big bore exhausts. They sit there at the crossroad revving their engine making all amounts of noise. There have been times I have wanted to hang out the front window and throw bricks at the cunts, but then I would get in trouble. The world isn't fair. Normally I just kick the shit out of a door or two (which again in an ironic twist makes my house less marketable and thus makes it more difficult to escape this third level of hell).

I am not sure the reason for such big exhausts on such shitty cars. To a degree fair enough if some performance car has one but a 1l corsa? All it seems to do is make a racket, perhaps it is a chav mating signal indicating the owners virility (or at least a place to fumble and spawn bastards outside of the family home(s)). Or it could be something else, after all my view of chavs is they are asexual in nature. Male and females of the species don't look significantly different and most cases of asexual reproduction occur in species where delineating gender would require too much intelligence. There seems to be no other way of explaining the prevalence for chav children in a species so utterly devoid of mental capacity, it can only be asexual reproduction.

The second worst offenders are motorcyclists, especially weekenders. You know the ones, stock brokers in a midlife crisis buys some Harley or similar which makes enough racket just standing still, let alone moving. Sunday is supposed to be a quiet time for reflection, not so with these bastards who roar up the road breaking what little idyll I had.

Now I wont even go into the omnibus or articulated lorries, cunts the lot of them.

So there you have a small sample of some of the reason why I hate the car, best you don't ask me about when I've been drinking, you might regret the question :)

Anyway I apologise for nothing...

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